Who wants to be dictated to by the State on how you support your children — what, how and when?

Whilst many views float around arguing for and against child support, most decent fathers and parents would argue the issue is not whether or not they wish to support their children, but rather the often unfair conditions imposed upon them.

Simply, it's an attack on the nature of a father's freedom and how he best wishes to raise and support his children in the many different ways a responsible father can, which are often more effective and benefical to a child than any 'slap-bang' instrument of government and statism can ever be.

For a father going through separation/divorce, experiencing the loss of family and children, horrendous false allegations, litigation, uncertainty of where your children are and how they are doing, often causes ill health, work and life instability in so many ways. Also, the effects from not having a fully functioning and emotionally present Dad in a child's life can be equally, if not more devestating as their development can be hindered considerably.

Then if that isn't bad enough, along comes an assessment from the Child Support Agency (CSA) for an outlandish sum of money based on your capacity to work at the highest rate when you were fit and able and on fire, which is possibly a stark contrast to where your financial position is today, or will be in the future if you are unable to recover from the upheaval of a traumatic separation that's often compared to a fate worse than death.

From 2006 CSA powers in Australia have increased to not only garnish your wages, but directly withdraw from bank accounts any amount they deem appropriate, siezing assets of any sort to pay the often highly questionable and unjust debts. As Fathers are assaulted with such draconian measures, one can only feel a sense of dictatorship giving rise to a totalitarian society — not a free Australia — causing fathers to unite and fight for their rights and freedom.

As there are many issues surrounding child support and the effects upon fathers, children and families,

Share your opinion and experiences about the pros and cons of child support,
lifting the veil on a most horrid part of family breakup!

<Prev 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 Next>259 - 210 Comments +Add Yours Over 992,307 viewsSearch CSA Forum
 
By: gman from victoria, australia on August 3, 2014 @ 9:26 pm
Hi looking for the lawful rules to determine if a garnishment order is lawful. So far they hold no signsture or name it.just says director, no two are the same either, ive already caught employer stealing under the guise of an order. On top of this i owe nothing due to care and situstion plus i should be thousands in credit but they refuse to credit despite agreeing ive paid. List goes on but i refuse to believe an unendosed order is legitamate. Help

 
By: dingo from nsw, australia on July 27, 2014 @ 10:32 pm
csa were mongrels 10 yrs ago & they're still mongrels today! no matter which side of the fence one sits on. winners(csa) & losers(families) is their mantra!!!! how many pple can relate to that??
 
By: steven from Victoria, Australia on July 27, 2014 @ 3:54 pm
Is it just me or when you ring the CSA you just get this feeling as the payee you are a criminal if you even question the amount of child support you have to pay.
I don't know how many have experienced the circle of working overtime because you may need extra money to get your car fixed or a new hot water service ..or worse you need your car fixed a new hot water service and a microwave all in one hit.
It so happens my company thought i was averaging 6-10% of my pay in O/T each year so they gave me a pay rise which fixed my salary. Wonderful but it amounted to less than 1 hr pay per week. When my tax was done and the amount of child support was calculated it dumped my child support up by nearly $120 a month extra because of the OT. I rang CSA to say i can forward proof that my salary was less and I worked the O/T to buy new microwave as it is my only form of cooking, hot water service and have some serious work done on my car to get to work. They then said as all my OT wasn't greater than 10% of my salary they won't take it into account and will have to make do until the next financial year. Talk about taking a belting...
For a single guy paying for a 13 year old that he can't ever see its sole destroying at best. But I'm sure I'm over ally sensitive when I call the CSA in some glimmer of hope they may take a little sympathy from your side. But I'm afraid even the last time I called the response was...You have to understand the cost of raising the child...Hello I said my 13 yr old son is getting 29% of my take home. I'm sure I must be totally selfish in my lack of understanding in this matter.
Steven
 
By: edwina from nsw, austrlia on July 23, 2014 @ 3:21 pm
gotta call from csa other day saying ex owes $75 and did I have another contact point for him or did we have a both have a private arrangement. my youngest turned 18 a month ago. told them its not worth the hassle having only ever being paid $110 in two and half years and him being under assessed working for himself. what a joke csa!
 
By: Steven from Vic, Australia on June 30, 2014 @ 7:47 pm
CSA comments
 
By: Anthony from Vic, Aust on June 18, 2014 @ 3:54 pm
RUN FOR THE HILLS...

I luv it when it always the partner of an ex gets involved only to find that the person they knew hasn't REALLY shown you their TRUE COULORS.
What I mean by this is time and time again I see that once you are in the SAME situation as the EX...ie, have 2 kids ect, THEN AND ONLY THEN will you understand.
So until then...BELIEVE what you want.
GOOD LUCK!!!

 
By: Partnersupport from QLD, Australia on June 17, 2014 @ 7:00 pm
Thank you. We have plans to have children next year. He is a beautiful partner and very considerate of me in all of this. He doesn't like me worrying about it but knows it's because I care. He has sent her 3 messages now asking more details on the situation - why the daughter is so upset, why she was going to councillor to begin and is ignored. That is a game to me and I feel like a father is entitled to know this stuff. Different if he was a bad father but he is the most incredible father I have ever met. Thank you for you kind comments.
 
By: Pina from Victoria, Australia on June 17, 2014 @ 6:34 pm
You sound like a loving and caring partner doing everything right for everybody. After reading it all my main concern was for you and whether your desires are being met. ie. do you want kids one day and if so, with who?

Sometimes step partners give endlessly and put up with alot, all to find that one day they're on the outer wondering where there life has gone. Other than that, follow your heart and intuition..
 
By: Partnersupport from QLD, Australia on June 17, 2014 @ 12:31 pm
Hi Everyone,

Would absolutely love your advice, support, feedback... whatever it is you might have.

So - I am the partner of the most devoted, loving, present and active father. He is currently going through the mediation process to have shared parenting of his daughters (5 & 11). His boys were never encouraged to come and see him after separation - needless to say his relationship with them has suffered and he only see's them when he drives to their house to collect them for school each morning. In April this year, my partner decided it was time for him to fight for what he felt was right for him and his children - a 50/50 split. His daughters absolutely adore him. He collects them for school each morning, takes them to their sporting activities and even coaches both of their teams. When their mother was contacted in regards to his decision in April, she took it upon herself to tell the 11yr old (who is highly sensitive at the best of times) that her father had gone to see someone to see them more. This resulted in her having a meltdown and not wanting to stay at her dads that week - which was allowed. They recently had their mediation appointment and the mother messaged him the day prior to inform him that the 11yr old had been going to counselling since February (2 months prior to finding out). He had no idea and still has no idea what she originally went for. The mother is now using this to the best of her ability to make the father feel bad for wanting shared parenting. Just last week she sat in a mediation room and told the mediator that she was all for 50/50 split but 3 days later she has sent him messages telling him that he is selfish for doing this, she has sobbed and sobbed and he is breaking her heart and spirit and that she will protect her until the day she dies. YET - when she is with her father she is happy, loving and actually cannot get enough of her father. She asks him to take her to extra sports training etc. The mother has told the father not to talk to the daughter about it that they will discuss it at counselling.

I am so confused and hurting for him. People say don't get involved but it's really hard not to. Sometimes I feel like maybe I am the problem. I show them love, do nice things with them, attend all their events and they on most occasions show me a great amount of love back. The 11yr old on the weekend was really REALLY rude to me and I felt like I couldn't say anything because I don't want to upset anyone at this point with all that's going on. The 11yr old is known for of acting things and being a little over dramatic - actually - very over dramatic at times. I feel like my partner is being manipulated by the mother and quite possibly played by the daughter too - not taking away from the fact that I know it would be terribly hard. Her life is not being effected in any other way - she is still participating at school, sport, friends and she is still happy at our place and has made no mention of it.

Sorry it's a bit all over the shop! Any advice would be greatly appreciated as I truly feel so lost amongst all of this. I have no idea what advice to give my partner or how to deal with it myself.

 
250. By: AJ from NSW, Australia on June 13, 2014 @ 9:57 pm
Everyone knows the system is failing all the good parents out there....why not make CSA responsible for both child support and custody/contact? Then a parent withholding contact with children can be penalised via child support
Under the current system, one parent can easily make a claim to CSA for more money but the parent doing the right thing can spend thousands in court just to see their own child. And the parents who choses not to work should have a minimum wage assessment placed on them, similar to the US (hey they do a lot of stupid things in the States but at least their system is starting to recognise that BOTH parents should work to support their children).
Once the kids are in school there is no excuse for parents not working, our welfare system makes it too easy.
 
By: dishcloth from wa, aus on June 9, 2014 @ 11:01 pm
DO NOT VOTE FOR NICK XENOPHON. HE HAS MADE HIS INTENTIONS CLEAR ON CURRENT AFFAIR TONIGHT.

 
By: John from NT, Australia on May 22, 2014 @ 11:15 am
Payers
Please be reminded that the online survey is a great way to provide your opinion of the CSA and how it treats us.
I found the survey provided enough blank screens for comments where I could further expand. For example, there was a Q on how I thought the kids were coping e.g. depression, anxiety etc etc. To which I responded a few Q later "I don't know the state of my kids because I am lucky if I c them 1 hr per week.

I was also able to mention Parental Alientation Syndrome (PAS). Which is an issue in my case.

So this is a great opportunity to tell the truth!

Whether it makes any difference well that's another question.

Good luck
 
By: Randall from W.A, Aus on May 19, 2014 @ 3:44 pm
Hi All, Child Support
Please have your say. go to the link below and get your voice out there.
http://www.aph.gov.au/childsupport
On 27 March 2014, the Minister for Social Services, the Hon Kevin Andrews MP, asked the Committee to inquire into and report on the Child Support Program.
The Committee will be holding hearings in many Australian cities, which will be open to the public.
I have sent letters to the minister for Human Services and have had a response that some action is being made to improve. while chances of changing the system are unlikely at least you will be one of the many to have a say. tell anyone you know who deals with this terrible system to get on and have a crack. takes 20min to complete, and as you all know something needs to happen. I emplore you to help me and the many like me and to more of an extent,, Yourself. good luck
 
By: Wilma from Queensland, Australia on May 14, 2014 @ 4:32 am
Hi Helen
I just wanted to say how heartfelt sorry I am for you and your partner. The whole system of child support is nothing short of a disgrace. The worse thing for me is that I do not understand how the Government stands back and lets it happen with the full knowledge that payers are suffering in every way. They know the hardships the payers are feeling and the depression it is causing. It doesn't just stop at the payer, it is his/her's whole family that feels the stress on a constant basis. It's got me stumped as to where the human care is amongst the Governments of today. Women are having babies and making a career out of it. The payers are left with virtually nothing in their take home pay for basically one third of their working life at the most the CSA can extract from them, sometimes based on unbelievable decisions. 23% before tax works out to be roughly 29% of their take home wages for a 13 year old and upwards. Don't get me wrong, I think the fathers need to pay towards the upkeep of the child, but not when the payer has nothing left to live on. There is something very wrong with the whole system. I wish the Government would realise this and act on it. It isn't that they don't know what is happening, but it is all just brushed under the carpet and the truth hidden from the public eye.
Wilma
 
By: Greg from VIC, Australia on May 13, 2014 @ 4:31 pm
Hi Helen

The essense of your story is so familiar to me. It's funny how when people seperate there has to be a huge revenge thing happening but perhaps thats why they seperated. A personality that would be capable of doing the horrible things you mentioned.
My posting was to alert people that a redundancy payout is CHILD SUPPORT EXEMPT. They willsay otherwise until you speak to the right person at the agency. It worked for me.

So sad to read how much your partner had to pay when we all know it doesn't cost that much to raise kids

Regards

Greg

 
By: Helen from Queensland, Australia on May 13, 2014 @ 3:19 pm
I feel so sad for so many people (including all those kids who are missing out due to a vindictive parent) caught up in this unfair 'system'. All too often many of us share the same stories. My partner's ex is a piece of work who only thinks of herself (not the kids welfare as she keeps on saying she does) and getting as much money out of my partner as possible (this was NZ$400 per week until recently). My partner thought his Parenting Consent Order was filed in Australian Court. It turned out the lawyers and legal aid failed him and his ex moved the children to NZ without his permission. He didn't go down the path of Court order etc due to the fact that his ex had so emotionally blackmailed the kids that they thought (and still continue to do so) that it was all his fault (and mine for being the bad influence) that the family had split up. Meanwhile my partner's ex had had an affair (whilst they were still together) and ended up moving the guy into their home a month after my partner moved out and was soon pregnant with her 3rd child from the 3rd father (my partner adopted her first son as his own and they have a daughter between them). When the ex's new relationship didn't work out she turned all her vindictiveness onto my partner and myself keeping the children away from us with every known excuse in the book. She's teaching the kids that belittling and swearing at their father and me as well as putting down the phone on us is acceptable behaviour. She's teaching them to lie and make up every excuse (following her example) and we both feel so helpless. That's just the tip of the iceberg as you can imagine. The kids are 13 and 10 years old. Like a decent person that he is my partner continued to pay child support into her Australian account after she took the children to NZ and didn't let us know where they were for 3 months. The ex then setup child support with NZ and my partner then had to go through a long convoluted process to try and obtain some of the money back that he had paid out in 'double payments'. The ex lied to the Child Support agency about the money she was receiving. So much of this has taken its toll on my partner and I, especially my partner who my heart goes out to. He is a decent man and a good father who is being kept from his children and is unable to provide much in the way of good influence in their lives. He was demoted at work - his boss spoke about his lack of concentration and he recently went to the doctors who diagnosed depression. Of course, the way was brought up it's not the manly thing for him to admit or to succumb to medication. I am worried about him and I am worried about the children and I feel powerless. We don’t have money for legal fees and Courts, etc… For my partner there are rays of hope with support networks for fathers like this one. Thank you.
 
By: Greg from Victoria, Australia on May 2, 2014 @ 10:00 am
Hi everyone.
I have experienced everything others have when it comes to the way CSA treat fathers. Clearly they have a culture to disagree with anything the father says no matter what but here's one win that I did have that must affect other fathers.
I received a redundancy package some years ago and even though I told the CSA it will appear on my tax return and not to include it as normal pay (they said OK)when my tax return was lodged they stole $3500 and then said bad luck.
I objected, while unemployed, many times with no success until I spoke with a MALE at the CSA. He agreed and the entire amount was refunded.
This has to be a precedent for all others I would think!

Whenever you phone child support, make sure you ask to speak with a male staff member!
 
By: rusty from wa, Australia on May 1, 2014 @ 2:38 pm
My ex refuses to work more than 20 hours a week, last financial year she was not working at all our 6 year old is in school and the 2 year old at daycare and we have equal shared custody. But I have to pay her an amount to top her income as she only works 20hrs - she doesn't even have the kids with her when she is at home - while Im doing 100 hrs a fortnight and actually spend time with my kids during the week I have them. CSA dont care and DCP dont care that she is a fucking junkie around my kids
 
By: Randall from W.A, Aus on April 26, 2014 @ 10:36 am
Thanks Sammy and i suspect you have hit the nail fair and sqaure on the head. I am going to try the same thing however i am sure that she lives in an alternate universe where she believes that in the dictionary entitlement is represented under her name, with numerous criminal convictions for stealing i wasnt aware of until after seperation when all of a sudden my friends started acting as such, therefore if she can get her way and and screw me over at the same time as getting as much doh as possible(allowed by our flawed sytem) then that is how she will proceed. only time will tell and some court appearances. Cheers Sammy, Oh and a torn hamstring here from skiing last weekend, feel your pain.
 
240. By: Sammy G from NSW, Australia on April 23, 2014 @ 2:16 pm
I wouldd like to say welcome Randall to one of the most unfair and illogical set of processes of all time, the Govt flunkees vs Man however its more like commiserations. She prob stoppd u seein kids cos she wanted more doh plus after awhile they learn they cann get away with it so they do it to spite father plus to much bother? My ex tried that many years ago so I threatend her with gettin custody so she pulled her head in. No class action that i know off but don't think most men want to look after kids for most of the time, just see them here n there..signing off fellas ...Sammy G wit a crook knee
 
By: Randall from W.A, Australia on April 22, 2014 @ 8:26 pm
I have been paying child support directly to my ex for over 2 years. Recently she decides to stop me seeing our kids, calls chld support and just like that they may as well patted her on the back and said well done. Now you have stopped him seeing the kids we will get you some more money. holy shit balls how can a Government agency condone and encourge this behaviour by not emposing any penalties to the person holding the kids. I am just gobsmacked and outraged all at the same time. Child support means whoever does the worst acts to the other parent shall get the best outcome.unjustified, ludicrous and downright crazy. i am goin to have a crack at the courts and have engaged the best lawyer i can find/ afford. i am not confident but i am pissed and if it all goes pear shaped at least i tried. then its war. i will lobby officials, i will become a pest, i will continue to do what i can to promote awareness and change.
Q: Has or does anyone know if a class action has been tried against these obvious flaws in F.L.A and C.S.A affecting all good parents in Australia?
Change doesnt just come, it must be embraced, earned and encouraged by all those seeking a better way! And only then can suitable action and outcmoes begin to emerge.
 
By: Daveyone from Hertfordshire, United Kingdom on April 9, 2014 @ 3:16 pm
CSA? Don't Pay if your kids are held to ransom!
 
By: Tess from WA, Australia on April 8, 2014 @ 1:38 pm
My partner (fiance) has been paying $150 per week to his ex wife for one dependant who is to be 18 years old this coming June 1st 2014. His son has not attended school for 2 years and only works a part time job. We have been together for just over two years. He has been separated (now divorced) for 21/2 years and paying his ex wife for their son the agreed amount of $150 per week for the whole time we have been together. In Jan this year he reduced the payments to $80 per week because he was sinking furthur into debt to the amount of approx $60000.00. When he changed to $80 per week he messaged his ex-wife that he needed to reduce the payments, apologising and stating that their son should now be working full-time and that he was covering his room and weekly board. His ex-wife quit her job mid feb this year,(her last tax return was $63,000) and went to CSA asking them to collect on her behalf (back dating 3 months)at an income of zero!???. CSA have threatened to take my partners wages and tax returns etc. He has only 6 weeks to go till his son is 18. CSA will not listen to our circumstances, and will not take into consideration our financial status.When he left his wife he took all the family debt $40000.00 which includes his ex wife's car (she drives around in). He still owes $30000.00 of that loan.He has given his ex wife since they split for a son NOT going to school and NOT working FULLTIME $16,000.00 to date.My partner is supporting me and my daughter as wellas my daughters father is one of those "shifty fathers" who doesn't want to pay anything and because he owns his own business - doesn't pay!
 
By: Ron Ferguson from NSW, Australia on April 8, 2014 @ 11:52 am
The flawed system is the CSA the very agency that keeps me too broke to fight. Bo they are not interested in you as a person you're just dollar signs to CSA.
 
By: John from NT, Australia on April 8, 2014 @ 11:07 am
What we need in this country is a Bill of Rights!
It is quite illuminating that we don't have one and check this link out for the reason why. Good old Honest John - what a legend!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bill_of_rights
As always - good luck gents; in this cuntry, you will need it.
 
By: Bo Carter from WA, Australia on April 8, 2014 @ 7:59 am
I found out a month ago that the mother of my sons 16 and 15yrs old kicked them out and disowned them. Since December last year she has been living with a bloke(undeclared to Centrelink) and claiming both Family Allowance and Child Support. I contacted the CSA by email to give them all the details and when I eventually spoke to them they said they rarely read emails and that I need proof by getting in touch with Centrelink as my oldest is on YA. My oldest son is finally safe back in Perth and his brother lives with his gf's family. This mother tried to make my kids wards of the state when they were toddlers without my knowledge, she was and still is using drugs and alcohol, has been frauding centrelink since the day they were born and isn't in jail where she belongs. I have always paid for my boys and doing nothing wrong y the law yet the CSA makes us fathers out to be assholes. I have contacted the state ombudsman and centrelink with the proof but I guess the geraldton office will just keep on plodding along not giving a shit. Just wish the snobby cows at CSA would bloody listen instead of being chauvinistic pigs.
 
By: Neil from Sth Aust, Aust on April 7, 2014 @ 6:58 am
Thanks Anthony. One just gets to that point in life where you see many things with crystal clear clarity. For instance the duality of the political system is one of the most cockeyed concepts I have ever come to witness. Politicians fighting against each other is bloody useless, more division as opposed to unity. Plus the system pays them handsomely to shut up, don't question the big & important issues, do nothing, do as your told and have fun. We don't care what you do or what trivial policies you make just don't step on the big boys toes! Just act like spoilt kids and just put on a pretend play for everyone to watch - no one cares, no one will put you in jail, as a politician you have a get out of jail free card. Yes politics is one big circus which the unenlightened buy into. A big distraction to keep everyone & the media fooled & distracted. Play your cards right & we will even put a few dollars in your back pocket. There's a good boy. As for the courts representing the little people fairly against corporations or the system, that's like the wizard of oz fairy tale, all make believe. Why is everything so wrong, backward & upside down? It's not that everyone is dumb it's that the people in key or gatekeeper positions get well looked after & controlled. What can we do about this mess fathers near & far? The political & legal bravado can be likened to an old derelict house - it needs to be burnt down!!! & something fairer, more equitable & intelligent needs to replace it.
 
By: Anthony from Vic, Australia on April 6, 2014 @ 7:56 pm
Agreed Neil.

This will be my last post as I'm happy that the core of the issue can be seen clearly. Please read the previous posts.

However, nothing will ever change as long as all these system are in place.
The sad reality of the truth is that for some the system works and for most it doesn't.
I believe the solution is in mental health, as the industry is only 50 or so years old. It is my understanding that the entire psychology study is a fraud brainwashing people with LIES, rather than giving the people the information to make an informed decision in life.
We are mearly slaves to the system to allow our rulers to have ultimate control of the masses.
Until the masses decide NOT TO PARTICIPATE, which will never happen, then we will continue to be on the MERRI-GO-ROUND.
Enjoy the ride and don't forget to smile.
 
By: Neil from Sth Aust, Aust on April 6, 2014 @ 6:49 pm
Child support facts & let's be clear everybody...
Both mums & dads know the child support system is f##kd!
Both good mums & dads get screwed over by the CSA mechanisms.
Shifty dads often escape responsibilities for their kids, not just child support payments but everything.
Then there are bitchy mums who alienated dads from kids &/or don't need the money yet they pursue CSA payments vigorously.
Will there ever be any fair balance? No, not until the govt(corporation) falls, people's values improve, there is a crisis that diverts our attention away from petty issues or everyone wakes up one day & decides not to participate in the many illusions that are taking place. There are better ways for families, whether separation is the answer or not, however whilst big daddy (State/Fed corporations not govts) look after mummy & the kids, nothing much will ever change. The game is rigged to keep people down & under the thumb as that way they are controllable. When good mums are left, they usually get the kids and centrelink which is generally enough, bar sometimes a drop in living standards. When the good dads are left, they often get limited/nil time with their kids & cop a csa debt if they are an employee. If a csa debt starts to grow it must be dealt with quickly, whatever the action. Big debts as with John D can only be avoided if there is no taxable income, money in banks or assets. You have to become a strawman. In time, ways to wipe the fictional debt of may open up, but apart from that it has to be forgotten about. You could also try & wipe it off your personal wealth in trust denoted by your birth certificate if you dig deep enuf & prepared to do the work. good luck everyone
 
230. By: John Daly from nsw, Australia on April 4, 2014 @ 11:11 pm
wife no supply children as per court order for 12 years...SO....I no pay child support...I now have a billfor $67k...she is on eazy street now

 
By: Ron Ferguson from NSW, Australia on April 3, 2014 @ 7:31 pm
Try telling CSA that even though you pay maintenance you can't see your kids, it wwill achieve nothing they jusy want money. Dad's rights are a myth.
 
By: nat from victoria, australia on April 3, 2014 @ 6:51 pm
Hey johnsie,
Shes 2 yrs old and no hes no being forced to pay but hes paying when he sees her.which is once every 6 to 8 weeks when the mother feels like it. Then all of sudden the next week shes says no and threatens him with a DVO. Hes so confused and doesnt know what to do. Thanks
 
By: Johnsie from Qld, Austrlia on April 3, 2014 @ 1:12 pm
Attn Nat: Must be heartbreaking 4 little girl and dad as many of us know only too well. Yep if cant reason with mum courts only step or just walk away and start a new life...sad but true. How old his daughter and is he being forced to pay child support without any contact??
 
By: nat from victoria, australia on April 3, 2014 @ 1:09 pm
Thanks Neil,
I agree totally. I think he will have to apply to courts himself and try to get access that wway.hopefully. do you know the costs involved and how we go about representing ourselves without a lawyer? Thanks
 
By: Neil from Sth Aust, Aust on April 3, 2014 @ 11:08 am
Hi nat, those with no money sometimes win with Legal Aid as sometimes having a lawyer is better than no lawyer, but on the whole LA is useless. It's been abused by the lawyers for a long time & the slush fund has run dry. People who sincerely need help simply don't get it. Like many things incl. the Family Court, LA started off with good intentions but turned into an abusive, unfair machine promoting inequality. Mediation & the Relationship Centres are only a facilitating service that can save parents legal costs if they are both willing to negotiate & be generous in spirit. As soon as one parent wants to be difficult & refuse, it becomes a waste of time. If your male friend is being refused contact with his little girl, his only recourse is to make application to the family court/fed mag & seek contact that way. He can do it himself with no cost save app fee (less with health care card). I don't advocate the court but sometimes its the only way & better than nothing.
 
By: nat from victoria, australia on April 2, 2014 @ 7:23 pm
Well im a mother of 2 gorgeous children and I have raised them both solo...I dont get child support but I dont complain about it either. Ive spent 18 years on my own paying for my childrens needs.i had to go out get a job and work my butt off to make up enough to cope. Its so unfair on all the dads out there who do care and want equall rights. I have 2 friends who are male and are currently fighting for visitation with their kids and the system is letting them down. Legal aide are refusing to help saying that during mediation the mother seemed to be co operative but shes not so they are not inyerested in helping my friend to see his daughter. How is this fair.does anyone know where he can go for help now so he can see his lottle girl???
 
By: Neil from Sth Aust, Aust on April 2, 2014 @ 2:46 pm
Income tax, GST & other hidden taxes, council rates & child support are all forms of unjust & illegal taxes upon the masses; naive, unsuspecting, unaware, fearful people who perceive their individual self as powerless. So what does one do?

Well first as an individual you have to say NO & return fire on the aggressor.

Secondly, we must collectively unite for strength & knowledge through the sharing of all our weapons against such aggressors. It's a war against us fellas, make no mistake about it, so it's time to stand up or be steam rollered and slaughtered. Our choice?
 
By: Nifty from NSW, Australia on April 2, 2014 @ 7:29 am
I have been a CSA payer for 10 years, C.S.A (Criminal's Advocates Australia)an organisation that has little to do with the support of children other than the stealing of money, they call this legal however, how different is it to stand over people. Do we get a say when our tax returns are stolen, our CS payment is determined by them. We have become pawns in an organisation that is run by tyranny and suppression

It is time that all CSA payer's stopped paying. Surely there is someone capable of setting up a web site so that a non violent protest or civil disobedience program can run whereby we stop paying until the system is fixed and people can live without the fear of being called a Dead Beat Dad
 
By: Anthony from Vic, Australia on March 30, 2014 @ 12:13 pm
Great post MichaelK...

Seems like you felt the full force of the injustice system.

I love it when police justify their use of force by quoting that women are the weaker species.
Legally, they are the stronger species and the more dishonest as well.

Angie...that's great ur not bitter, maybe I got u mixed up with Aly.
Regardless, there are a lot of men and women that have been taken for a ride by government agencies with false hopes and bullshit policy's.

From my experience the honest parent is normally left for dead and the courts profit enormously, making it a multi billion dollar a year industry.

Just goes to show that profits are put before families and that goes against what I stand for.

I don't think anything can be done, but to just raise awareness of the facts, meaning from experience, not from what is written in a fairy tale.



 
220. By: Angie from NSW, Australia on March 30, 2014 @ 10:53 am
news flash anthony im certainly not bitter and its certainly not about the money hes not hurting me hes hurting his kids
 
By: MichaelK from Victoria, Australia on March 30, 2014 @ 8:17 am
I've been down that path of Relationships Australia about 15yrs ago now. It was a Men and Separation group of about 6, went for 6wks and cost $10pw. It was helpful in that I met other guys, some in a similar boat to me with a lesbian ex. I was very isolated in my situation as a father with limited family and friends. I earnestly tried raising my 2 kids in a stable environment amidst dealing with legals, trumped up allegations, process servers, police and my ex and her lesbian lawyer always bothering me, emotional issues with my kids, plus my own emotional baggage from loss and grief issues exacerbated by a continuous assault by an often cruel and heartless breakdown system. Childhood issues arose and of course there were the ongoing financial issues, depression and inability to work as I often struggled, living day by day, sometimes minute by minute for many years. It was a hard time of my life.

Hence for me, the group was a place I could offload, breath a bit and grow some. Have kept friends with two comrades from the group, so to some degree I guess it was worthwhile. There are some genuine folk out there who try and help people going through tough stuff so if you come by these types of people be truly thankful. I also have tried to help many along my journey, so it's always nice when you hear a simple thanks.

Legally though, don't bother using RelAus or personal development groups as a basis to show you a good parent for court hearings as they're not interested and completely dismiss it, probably under some hearsay evidence rule.

Looking back now, I should never have bothered to justify myself to court cretins as a parent or person as my power is way above them, but hey my self esteem was low, my world had been turned upside down with fear and emotions ruling my life, confusion, immaturity and maladjustment were all upon me as I was hurdled into an ugly world of Separation and negative changes ripping at me, my family and everything I had believed was wholesome and right.

However, that's often the process of life as I have come to know it. We live, we feel pain, loss and then some more pain to remind us we're alive and we have something to learn. And then at some stage, sometimes without warning, we die - mentally, emotionally then physically. We come in with nothing, cause harm, become aware - maybe, realise our sins - maybe and hopefully work hard to redeem ourselves, leaving with nothing save the impact upon others, either good or bad. C'est la vie!
 
By: Ron Ferguson from NSW, Australia on March 29, 2014 @ 5:38 pm
Get your own bloody facts right. The more you earn the more you pay. If you got four kids and support drops to three it stays the same. Read the title FATHERS for justice, not whinging posts for women. You are not a non custodial father nailed to the wall by imaginary debts from CSA. I am in the stupid financial position that I am better off not teaching. If you post try using facts g
 
By: Anthony from Vic, Australia on March 29, 2014 @ 10:44 am
Lets go around in circles shall we...

Hahahaha.....would be good to read previous posts before you girls make assumptions.

Fact of the matter is that men's rights have been abused by government agencies for way too long...
So I have taken it apon myself to educate fathers to become better fathers and I'm not talking about the dollar signs you girls are soo fixed on.

Please compare the studies done on fatherless or motherless families and let me know what you think.

All the best with your bitterness and hopefully one day you will be sweet.

 
By: Angie from NSW, Australia on March 29, 2014 @ 9:44 am
Totally agree with you Aly some men need to grow up and take a reality check. My ex has been assessed at only $8 a week and even thats too much cos he doesn't even pay that. He has a lot more assets than I have, he lives with his mother, his choice. Plus despite him working too he gets out of paying anything!!!
He only sees his kids when he wants, ie special occasions like his birthday, fathers day, xmas and when he's free. Just like mums like you and I Aly, I also feel sorry for the dads who do the right thing and get screwed by the system.
 
By: Aly from NSW, Australia on March 29, 2014 @ 9:35 am
You might want to get your facts straight before making up rubbish about child support. If it doesn't change when your wages does than how come I only get a measly $10 a week despite my EX still working, living for free at his parents (his choice) & having over half a million in the bank?? I certainly have NO restrictions on when he can see the kids, except for when he was in & out of the Mental Hospital, after he'd threatenned to slit his throat in front of them among other things. How about stop spreading the hate & do the right damn thing by the children!!!!! I don't know ANY woman who gets decent child support, & it's about time men grew BALLS & did the right thing by their children!!!
 
By: Harold H from qld, australia on March 28, 2014 @ 5:14 pm
Gee is this mutual love, trust and respect? Hmmm sounds fabulous. Does it include the bit where after the kid is born she renegs and pisses off unilaterally flushing love, trust and respect down the toilet and then jumping on your balls for child support?

No worries, I love being abused. Sign me up and order me 10 courses to go.

 
By: John from NT, Australia on March 28, 2014 @ 10:17 am
Guys how do you like this for an exciting intro to a course hosted by Relationships Australia. Note: the tone in the Course Outline. I don't care who this upsets but it is time to scrape ourselves off the floor and get treated as Human Beings again: This is so demeaning and a pile of crap.

Cheers
John
<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<
It’s not too late!

Our 12-week In Pursuit of Respectful Relationships Course for men (Brochure attached) commences this Thursday 27 March (6 – 8:30PM).

It is possible for men to commence the course in Week 2 if need be (i.e. Thurs 3 April), but not after this date.

Any man who is interested in doing the course needs to attend an individual information session first.
So please contact our reception on 89234 999 ASAP.


Details:
In Pursuit of Respectful Relationships: a 12 week course for men who want a relationship based on love, trust and respect… However recognise and are concerned about their actions toward family members. At times family members may find the actions controlling and or abusive. This program assists men to show and foster relationships of love, trust and respect. When: 12 weeks on Thursdays from 27th March to 12th June 6.00pm – 8.30pm
Where: Relationships Australia, 2nd floor, 43 Cavenagh St, Darwin
Cost: $120
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Wankers!
 
By: BRAD from wa, oz on March 27, 2014 @ 10:32 pm
Please can we get a better way to update the site???
my last comment makes me look like a retard!!!
 
By: BRAD from wa, oz on March 27, 2014 @ 10:24 pm
I threatened the slime at csa once.
I said ... You hurt Me them I will have to hurt you, as I see what they do as theft, pure and simple. They called the cops! I got instantly three calls !!!! To check on me!! I said u felt like setting fire to my car on the freeway at peak hour to raise awaeeness to my cause! and this would work !!!!! awarenessto
 
210. By: Ron Ferguson from NSW, Australia on March 27, 2014 @ 7:38 pm
Guys we are dispersed all over Australia. Getting together is impractical but civil revolution isn't. Take a car and park it on a railway crossing, whether it's yours or not is your choice. You have to inconvenience people and cost them money before they listen. Father's Day? Perfect!